I’m now back from the

September 14, 2003

I’m now back from the World Championships of Freestyle Wrestling; specifically, the finals thereof. Remind me to never in my life fuck with any of those people. Here follows my (admittedly clueless) analyses of a few of the matches.

  • Kristie Marano (USA) vs Ewelina Pruszko (Poland) [67 kilos]: U-S-A! U-S-A! Yeah! Suck it, Polacks.
  • Kaori Icho (Japan) vs Sara McMann (USA) [63 kilos]: As you can see, McMann had some nice moves there. By the time overtime rolled around, Icho was tired and showing it, to boot. But McMann got overagressive and lost. Tarnation.
  • Arif Abdullaev (Azerbaijan) vs Yandro Quintana (Cuba) [60 kilos]: Damn, these guys are good. Quintana was in better physical shape, but Abdullaev knew what he was doing a little better, and was able to keep his early lead despite obvious fatigue. His early lead was due to the fact that he can strike as fast as a viper and then suplex you too.
  • Bouvasia Saitiev (Russia) vs Mourad Gaidarov (Belarus) [74 kilos]: Boringest. Match. Ever. There were no earned points in this match; each player gave his opponent two points by failing to clinch properly at some point; the winner was the one with the least fewest passivity penalties against him. That, and both guys were the exact same except for their singlet colours — this match was basically just Ryu vs. Ryu, except with no punches, kicks, acrobatic leaps, throws, fireballs, whirlwind kicks, or dragon punches. Just a lot of Hochuling, essentially.
  • Eldar Kurtanidze (Georgia) vs Ali Reza Heidari (Iran) [96 kilos]: Remind me especially not to fuck with either of these guys. Or the 120 kilo guys, I suppose, but I’m too lazy to write about them right now. In any case, both of these fellows have been world champions in this weight class in the past, and they sure act like it, too, Kurtanidze especially. I almost didn’t see the arm throw out of the clinch he used on the [much larger] Iranian fellow, it was so quick, but I sure saw Heidari hit the mat.

In other news, Iranians really really seem to like cheering for their wrestlers.

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