Life imitates art

June 11, 2014

…assuming an early-90s Eddie Murphy movie with a 13% Tomatometer rating qualifies as ‘art’.

Anyway. This is a Louisiana congressman explaining what he was promised for a vote:

McAllister said he voted “no” on legislation related to the Bureau of Land Management though he did not identify the bill. McAllister said a colleague on the House floor told him that he would receive a $1,200 contribution from Heritage Foundation if he voted against the bill. He would not name his colleague since he “did not want to put their business out on the street.”

“I played dumb and asked him, ‘How would you vote?’” McAllister said. “He told me, ‘Vote no and you will get a $1,200 check from the Heritage Foundation. If you vote yes, you will get a $1,000 check from some environmental impact group.’”

That answer was a surprise, McAllister said.

“I said, ‘Are you serious?’ and he told me, ‘Yeah, wait and see,’” McAllister said.

And this is an exchange in The Distinguished Gentleman, about a con man (it’s an Eddie Murphy movie, remember) who winds up in Congress and ends up being less crooked than his colleagues:

Terry Corrigan: For instance, where are you on sugar price supports?
Thomas Jefferson Johnson: Sugar price supports. Uhh… Where do you think I should be?
Corrigan: Makes no difference to me. If you’re for ’em, I got money for you from my sugar producers in Louisiana and Hawaii. If you’re against ’em, I got money for you from the candy manufacturers.
Tommy: You pick.
Corrigan: Let’s put you down as for. Now what about putting limits on malpractice awards?
Tommy: You tell me.
Corrigan: Well, if you’re for ’em, I got money from the doctors and insurance companies. If you’re against ’em, I got money from the trial lawyers. Tell you what, let’s say against.
Tommy: Terry, tell me something. With all this money coming in from both sides, how does anything ever get done?
Corrigan: It doesn’t! That’s the genius of the system!

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