Kablammo!

Let me be the first to wish you a happy and prosperous 2005.

In other news, 2004 has been a banner year so far. I lost my keys, found out I got a pathetic 168 on the LSAT, and have been dumping like a madman.

Whoa, man, the following quote from this article made me fucking laugh out loud:

Dr Brown examines his own faeces under the microscope to try to gauge how many worms currently reside within him.

Something about closely examining your own excrement in the name of science just seems deliciously absurd. Also they spell ‘faeces’ with that delicious ‘a’ in there. Granted, it would have been even cooler if they’d sprung for the ‘æ’ ligature dealie, but I suppose their awesomeness budget was already strained.

Tonight is Brazilian BBQ, all I can eat. Let’s see what happens.

Song of the Moment: «One Big Holiday» — My Morning Jacket

And so I did. Like a little baby. Congratulations, world; you’ve defeated me.

I just looked in the mirror and saw a stranger staring back at me. After a tense standoff, I burst into laughter and then felt like crying.

I’ve got a Management final in 4 hours and I couldn’t manage my way out of a wet paper bag. Whee!

Song of the Moment: «The Go in the Go-For-It» — Grandaddy

OK, so instead of doing any work this morning, I decided to figure out the chords to Grandaddy’s «Lost On Yer Merry Way» and to arrange Weezer’s «Say It Ain’t So» and Travis‘ «Baby One More Time» as waltzes. Is there anything particularly wrong with that? At least I got my study abroad application for next summer handed in yesterday. Chalk up one thing I didn’t completely fuck up this semester. Wheo!

Song of the Moment: «Let’s Get Retarded» — Black Eyed Peas

PS: Looks like Saddam’s been captured (maybe).

Words can’t express just how addictive a game Globulos is.

Words can’t express just how retarded South Africa’s Advertising Standards Authority is.

Words can’t express just how insane this judgment in Pakistan is.

Words can’t express just how retarded it is for people to complain about this kind of thing.

Words can’t express just how fucking funny this is.

Words can, however, express many different ways the world might end.

Words can’t express how much I love you.

Song of the Moment: «Out of the Races and Onto the Tracks» — The Rapture

Well, fuck. Turns out I’ve been running from nothing for the past 8 weeks. Should that make me feel better or worse? I guess ‘indifferent’ is all I have left. Fuck, I sure feel like an idiot though. Big fucking idiot. I’ll accept the fallout from my string of atrocious decisions recently, but that doesn’t mean I’m not a goddamn smacktard.

Jesus mother of Joseph on a urine-soaked cross, I wish… I wish I had actually done something with this semester. I wish I felt some kind of concern — any kind of concern — about what’s to come in the next week or so. I wish this abominable emptiness would fucking leave me alone. I wish I could just go to sleep right now instead of taking two final exams and writing two late papers. I wish I’d realized how reasonable people in general can be. I wish I’d registered for next semester’s classes when I was supposed to. I wish I knew what the fuck to register for. I wish somebody’d reached me a hand as I sank like a stone.

Manufacturing final, here I come.

Song of the Moment: «Sonata #2 “Funeral” in B Flat minor, Op. 35» — Frédéric Chopin

Once you scrape your way through the bottom of the barrel, you’ll come across a stratum of rock. Don’t lose heart, just keep chipping away at it — eventually you’ll fall through into the cesspool underneath. Rock bottom might be below this point, but for once I don’t want to keep going.

Song of the Moment: «I’m So Lonesome I Could Cry» — Hank Williams

I’m not all that tired, and it’s not like I didn’t just get up, and it’s not like I don’t have work to do, but I’m going back to bed anyway. So the clown can eat me. Why won’t the clown just eat me?

Song of the Moment: «Somewhere Else» — Travis